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Thursday, September 10, 2009

I Question, Even With No Answers, I Continue

Why is this happening?
I just don’t understand why
I always ask why


I know ill never get an answer
There has to be a reason, I just will never know
Only He knows that reason though
I have to trust that it has a point
Its all for the better


But why can’t I deal with it
I should be able to
Why is it never easier?
Why doesn’t it get better?
Everyone says “in time…”
Well fuck time
That time never comes
…I’m still waiting and you know what,
I always will be


They say, “I’m here for you”
I know this
I know I have people around
Yet I feel so alone
Why do I feel alone?
Why do I feel abandoned?


Why can’t I make it better?
I need to make it ok
If I’m not ok, that’s fine
But I need them to be ok
I need them to stop hurting
God please give me their pain
Ill take it from them
Take it in
Just stop their pain


I find it hard to stay positive
As soon I’m up, I’m knocked back down
I’m tired…they’re tired
Just wanting a break
If only for a week, hell a day
Just something
I know He always has my back
But I do begin to lose faith some days
I get it back quick
But I still question, that scares me
I need to be stronger
I need to be better
I need to keep going
…That’s tough


I know it’s just a test
I hope I can pass
With them by my side I’m sure I will
I know its not supposed to be easy
But damn…
I guess all we can do is go forward


The problem is
I feel like as soon as I move forward
I end up farther back than I started
I hope I can get somewhere
But at this rate
I’m lost, not sure which way to go
I could use a little help…


So again, I’m left with questions with no answers
Pain with no heal
Heartache with no mend
Just wondering if it will ever stop

2 comments:

  1. i know you wanna help your friends but you need to grieve. if you don't grieve or deal with your emotions then you'll feel worse.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I'm never giving you my pain Missy, and I'd never let God take it from me and give it to you, you don't deserve that.

    I love you
    M-Ow

    ReplyDelete