tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13132167606973841972024-03-05T03:03:51.390-06:00swirljust the words, thoughts, & ideas flowin in my head put to paper then brought to you...take what you wanthockeygirlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09075540547587492412noreply@blogger.comBlogger91125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1313216760697384197.post-5534395022629023942011-03-12T10:18:00.002-06:002011-03-12T10:18:57.216-06:00different blog... follow if you'd likehey guys. not posting here anymore. im strictly using this one<br />
<br />
http://specialkhockey.wordpress.com/<br />
<br />
if you still wanna read my <crazy> thoughts, jump on over to there.</crazy><br />
<br />
MuchLove2All<br />
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-krishockeygirlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09075540547587492412noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1313216760697384197.post-64073726475028016242010-09-10T18:01:00.002-05:002010-09-10T18:01:30.766-05:00finally<!--StartFragment--> <br />
<div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: blue;"><b>I was thinking the other day and came to the realization that when I finally say “I can’t get it right,” is when He says, “Finally, she gets it.”<o:p></o:p></b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: blue;"><b> <o:p></o:p></b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .5in;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: blue;"><b>Think about it, only when we start to realize that we are not and will NEVER be perfect or ‘get it right’, then will we actually get it. He shines through our imperfections. I was chatting with a friend the other day, and he pointed out that perhaps my brokenness is exactly what I needed to force me to fully depend on Him; breaking me down to almost nothing gives me no other option then to just look up. I am learning to hand it all over to Him, I am far from doing so, but I know that once I do, things will start to happen, not by my doing but by His. That is a promise we can all depend on. Now, it never says that ‘bad’ things wont happen, but it does say that all of it is used to help us learn and grow, it all has meaning and He is right there with us through it all. It is all for the good of us. <o:p></o:p></b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .5in;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 1.0in;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: blue;"><b>“…we know that in ALL things God works for the good of those who love him”-</b></span><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: blue;">Romans 8:28</span></b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: blue;"><b><o:p></o:p></b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: blue;"><b>As hard as it is to believe, every time, good AND bad, easy AND hard, happy AND sad, are all just being used to shape you the way He wants too and they are all working towards the overall good. You can’t have good times without bad ones, you couldn’t have easy days without hard ones, and you wouldn’t appreciate the happy times without the sad times. I fight myself everyday to remember that these hard times are just another step, that it WILL get better and it is all going to work out… He is right with me, showing me the way. This is something I am slowly learning.<o:p></o:p></b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: blue;"><b>I now know that I can’t get things right, believe me, I’ve tried so many ways and ‘fixes’, none of which worked… luckily, I know who can and does get everything right and I’m now in the perfect position for Him to say “finally”. So, now I say ‘here I am, I can’t do it, please help me.’ </b></span><o:p></o:p></div><!--EndFragment-->hockeygirlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09075540547587492412noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1313216760697384197.post-13038050778937852332010-08-26T23:46:00.002-05:002010-08-26T23:47:19.993-05:00blind<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 24px;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: normal;"><br />
</span></b></span></span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666;"><b><br />
</b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-indent: .5in;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666;"><b>Well... I’m here, 18 hours away from everything and everyone I know. I feel like I was already on quicksand in that place of familiarity but now I am definitely on quicksand. I am stepping out, onto unknown ground… could be solid or could be slippery, heck, I could even fall straight through. I am hoping that this is right, that this is the right time and thing to do, but I honestly don’t know. I am here now, I am going to go with it and as was pointed out to me smack dab in the middle of my 18 hour drive, <o:p></o:p></b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-left: .5in;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666;"><b><br />
</b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-left: .5in;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666;"><b>No matter how this turns out, it’ll be good. Maybe this is just an experience I am meant to have, regardless of the outcome.<o:p></o:p></b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666;"><b><br />
</b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666;"><b>I have to keep reminding myself of this or more so convincing myself of this. I just keep thinking about the stepping out even when you see no staircase or the lyric of only seeing once you move, </b></span><span style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666;"><b>"I wish I could see just three steps in front of me; But the lamp unto my feet, it only moves when I take a step..." I am then reminded of Hebrews 11:1, “</b></span></span><span style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666;"><b>faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see”. </b></span></span><span style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666;"><b> <o:p></o:p></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666;"><b><br />
</b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-indent: .5in;"><span style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666;"><b>I certainly am going into this journey fairly blind, I have no idea what I have gotten myself into. I am trying to trust that no matter what happens with this, I stay or I end up back home or somewhere else even, that I will be okay and that it is just another chapter. It all stems back to my trust or lack there of right now… one thing that I am working very hard on. I am constantly trying to remember, and am also being reminded, that in every step I take, You are right here with me that I will never step out on my own; which if I let that sink in and start to truly believe it deep down, in my heart and soul, is a very comforting thought. <o:p></o:p></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-indent: .5in;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666;"><b><br />
</b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-indent: .5in;"><span style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666;"><b>One thing a friend said to me has resonated with me, she told me that “</b></span></span><span style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666;"><b>worry ends when faith begins”… well I am searching for that faith and trying to leave the worry behind. </b></span></span><span style="color: black; line-height: 150%;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>hockeygirlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09075540547587492412noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1313216760697384197.post-5217734792294046232010-08-14T22:53:00.003-05:002010-08-14T22:58:57.224-05:00when "i'm okay" just isn't enough<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #999999;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><br />
</span></span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #999999;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;">You ever notice that when people ask you how you are, they most often times don't listen for the answer, I mean REALLY listen. I can not tell you how many times people ask that and I could say anything and they would respond pretty much the same way, with just the general answer of “well that’s good” or something similar. I don’t think people really care anymore, I think most just ask because that what you’re supposed to do... there is no interest in how the person actually is.<o:p></o:p></span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #999999;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><br />
</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #999999;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;">What happened to caring and genuinely wanting to know how the person is and what’s going on in their life...? When conversations lasted longer than “how are you”, “good, glad to hear”... the end. I would pretty much rather people just not say anything to me if they have no interest in my answer... just don’t ask, please. <o:p></o:p></span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #999999;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><br />
</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #999999;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;">Now, I understand that sometimes, you just don’t want to answer the question; you just want to say... “yea, I’m fine”, “I’m okay”, “its all good”, I’m notorious for those answers, so guilty as charged; and with most people, that’s sufficient because they either a) don’t really care how I am, b) don’t delve deep enough or see past the masks, or c) just see that I don’t really wanna talk about it. I understand and am just fine with options ‘b’ and ‘c’, but ‘a’ is what irks me... don’t just ask to be asking, ask because you actually care. <o:p></o:p></span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #999999;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><br />
</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #999999;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;">I can honestly say that if I ask you how you are, I really wanna know... otherwise I wouldn’t have asked. I can also tell you that one of those answers I’m notorious for will probably NOT slide with me... I dig deeper, I know when is an honest answer & when it’s a cover, like I said, I am notorious for those. I also know that I will continue to make sure that you know that I will listen and care about what you have to say, but that if you just tell me you don’t want to talk then I will leave you alone, but also know that I wont forget that you were clearly NOT okay & that I will most likely be checking on you again soon. <o:p></o:p></span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #999999;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><br />
</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #999999;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;">I think I just got a bit sidetracked but what I was trying to point out or remind people was that when you ask someone how they are, listen... REALLY listen, otherwise, don’t bother asking... take an interest in how your friends and family REALLY are. I know it’s hard in this very self centered society but you just gotta try. Take a step back, take it all in, and realize that it all goes back to care, which stems from the most important thing out there... LOVE. If we don’t love each other, then what good can come? LOVE is the key. <o:p></o:p></span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #999999;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><br />
</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; margin-left: .5in;"><span style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #999999;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;">“</span></span></span><span style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #999999;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;">Three things will last forever, faith, hope, and love, but the greatest of these is love” 1 Corinthians 13:13</span></span></span><span style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #999999;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #999999;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><br />
</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #999999;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"> I’m guilty of all these things, know that... and I’m right there with you, but i am also right there trying to change, trying to be a part of the generation that went back to caring and got back to the LOVE we were meant to share. <o:p></o:p></span></span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #999999;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;">. </span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #999999;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;">I'm really happy that I have a few friends who have taken the time to actually ask and care how I or others are doing and have not been fooled by my standard answers... they have forced me to be real and admit that maybe I'm not okay, maybe I do need to talk, and that maybe it IS okay that I'm not. So to you, thank you. I urge you all to do the same, it will help you as well as that person, I can guarantee that. </span></span><br />
<!--StartFragment--><!--EndFragment--><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #999999;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"> </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #999999;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><br />
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</div>hockeygirlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09075540547587492412noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1313216760697384197.post-61639944097431053372010-08-05T23:23:00.006-05:002010-08-05T23:25:52.367-05:00new<div style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: white; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial; font: normal normal normal 13px/19px Georgia, 'Times New Roman', 'Bitstream Charter', Times, serif; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0.6em; padding-left: 0.6em; padding-right: 0.6em; padding-top: 0.6em;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: white;">For those of you interested, i have a new blog site. it is strickly focusing on life/god/belief/journey. ill continue to post the poems/rants here though, but for some different content, check out the new one over at typepad</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: white;"><br />
</span> <span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: white;"> </span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: white;">http://specialkhockeywordpresscom.typepad.com/</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: white;"><br />
</span> <span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: white;"> </span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: white;">l.o.v.e</span></div>hockeygirlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09075540547587492412noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1313216760697384197.post-30483605972103156202010-07-30T15:13:00.000-05:002010-07-30T15:13:04.923-05:00Silence is a Scary Sound<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #351c75;"><b>I discovered something last night. As I was lying in bed, trying to sleep, something told me to turn off my music. Seems simple enough, right? Well not so much to me.<br />
<br />
You see, my music is my comfort, my safety net if you may. I turn it on every night and sleep with it playing softly from my headboard. It is an every night, every day, ALL day thing.<br />
<br />
You see, what I discovered is, I don’t like silence. I don’t know why, but I know it's true. Something about complete & utter silence, terrifies me. I don’t know if it's what I may or may not hear or if it's letting go of the safety net that is my music but I do know that it's holding me back & in some strange way, one of the heaviest burdens on my heart that I hold.<br />
<br />
Maybe it's because at that moment, of complete silence, I’m out there, on my own, completely exposed; from my mind to my heart all the way down to my soul. That is extremely scary to me.<br />
<br />
As hard as this is for me to admit, I didn’t have the courage or strength to let go of it last night, I just layed there and left my music on. I thought about reaching the SIX inches to the headboard to shut it off but couldn't bring myself to. I just layed there & fought back the tears. I couldn't get past my fear... and for that, I am ashamed.<br />
<br />
What’s sad is that I know it's important to be in complete silence at times, it's essential on so many levels. It is also something that I want & want to be able to do... but at this point, I just can't seem to handle it.<br />
<br />
Silence strips me of everything & leaves me alone with my heart, my mind, & my soul.<br />
<br />
And sadly enough, as I’m writing this, I have my music on.<br />
<br />
Some of you may read this and say 'its just music, what's the big deal, roll over & turn it off', but it is so much more than music and I’m embarrassed to say so much harder to me.</b></span></span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Helvetica;"><br />
</span>hockeygirlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09075540547587492412noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1313216760697384197.post-82200740285977863642010-07-28T22:24:00.001-05:002010-07-29T18:58:05.617-05:00"...no more pain, no more fear, no more sorrow..." ♫<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-indent: .5in;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: yellow;"><b>My mom’s aunt is dying. Mom went down to Dallas to see her and essentially say goodbye. Jan has cancer and has really given up, refusing andymore chemo or any other treatment for that matter. She was in the hospital but the doctors sent her home, there’s nothing more they can do. They sent her home to die in comfort. </b></span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: yellow;"><b> </b></span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-indent: .5in;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: yellow;"><b>There is no more helpless feeling than seeing someone you care about give up and submit to death; knowing that’s there’s NOTHING you can do to help them.</b></span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: yellow;"><b> </b></span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: yellow;"><b> I’m home in Arkansas with dad, mom’s on her own in Texas, having to deal with herself and her mother, Jan’s sister. Mom has little support there, there is some other family in town but still; I think it would be better if dad could have gone.</b></span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%;"><br /><br/></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: yellow;"><b> This afternoon, Wednesday- July 28, mom text me. She told me that Jan is really sick, not doing well at all and they don’t think she will make it to tomorrow and that Jan said she loved me. That last bit tears me up; she loves me…really, wow. I hardly have talked to her in the last year and barely saw her at all… maybe once every few years. To see that someone who only has few breaths, words, left took the time to use those words to tell me, me of all people, that she loves me… it kills me. It also reminds me of some things we all need to remember; we gotta make sure people know how we feel about the, tell them you care and love them. Do it now, you never truly know when you’ll get another chance. Another thing, love has no bounds, no matter if you talk to them every day or only every now and then, they still care about and love you, never forget that. </b></span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: yellow;"><b> </b></span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-indent: .5in;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: yellow;"><b>It’s sad that it takes death and circumstances such as that to bring people together and bring out the loving words and reminders. </b></span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-indent: .5in;"><br /><br/></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-indent: .5in;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: yellow;"><b> Death has always intrigued me, but more so the things that are brought to the surface because of death. I have mixed feelings on it; it’s sad in one sense but very joyful & peaceful in another, you’re finally free once death comes.<br/><br/>*aunt Jan died Thursday afternoon, July 29, 2010*<br/><br/> </b></span></span></span></div>hockeygirlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09075540547587492412noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1313216760697384197.post-12665580822696407122010-07-23T20:06:00.005-05:002010-07-23T21:51:32.116-05:00you just don't get it<div style="color: #666666; font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><b>no one understands. i want to believe someone does, but i just dont. no one gets it, i dont even myself. i wish i could explain, i wish i felt like someone remotely got it, then i could talk to them but they just dont. this feeling, i cant explain it even if i could i dont really feel like you'd understand. never have i felt like this, this pain... longing... draining... hurt... lost... this alone. what's changed, i dont really know. i felt like i was doing better, or trying too. but as of late, its gettin worse than it ever has been. it drains me to just think about, & actually produces physical pain. i went to a concert last night, a concert that could potentially change my life. it was the first time i just let go for a moment, but at the same time there were tears begging to fall throughout the whole set... tears that are still wanting to fall at this moment, almost 24hrs later. i dont know what happened, if things just hit close to home or i just had realizations or what, but i do know that i realized that feeling like this for much longer is not an option. there was one point last night where one song, one moment, a mere 4ish minutes that im still thinking about & cant get off my heart... at that point something clicked. </b></span></div><div style="color: #666666; font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><b><br />
</b></span></div><div style="color: #666666; font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><b>there is so much weight on my heart right now, physical pain that i cant fix... it needs to be relieved. </b></span></div><div style="color: #666666; font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><b><br />
</b></span></div><div style="color: #666666; font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><b>no one understands the way i feel, no one gets it... it's okay i guess. i just dont want to be forgotten, left... hung out to dry. please dont give up on me. help me. give me someone to talk too, just listen... </b></span></div>hockeygirlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09075540547587492412noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1313216760697384197.post-28245475160174835922010-07-10T20:16:00.000-05:002010-07-10T20:16:48.609-05:00sixty-five days<!--StartFragment--> <br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #cc0000;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><b>65 days…</b></span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #cc0000;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><b>It’s been sixty-five days.</b></span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #cc0000;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><b>What’s different?</b></span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #cc0000;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><b>…To tell the truth, at this point, not much.</b></span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #cc0000;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><b>More than likely, that’s my fault</b></span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #cc0000;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><b>But, </b></span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #cc0000;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><b>I’m about the same place I was when I started</b></span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #cc0000;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><b>Gaining more knowledge, </b></span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #cc0000;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><b>But</b></span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #cc0000;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><b>Along with it, more scars</b></span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #cc0000;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><b>Internal</b></span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #cc0000;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><b>External</b></span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #cc0000;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><b>Emotional</b></span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #cc0000;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><b>Physical</b></span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #cc0000;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><b>Sixty-five days</b></span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #cc0000;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><b>65 days since I started something new</b></span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #cc0000;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><b>Fresh</b></span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #cc0000;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><b>Since I started over</b></span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #cc0000;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><b>I guess I didn’t really truly start over</b></span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #cc0000;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><b>Just proceeded with a new emotion</b></span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #cc0000;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><b>Same direction</b></span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #cc0000;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><b>Same mistakes</b></span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #cc0000;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><b>Same hurts</b></span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #cc0000;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><b>Do I feel different?</b></span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #cc0000;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><b>Honestly, maybe a little</b></span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #cc0000;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><b>But not much</b></span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #cc0000;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><b>I want to, but I refuse to lie to myself and others and say yes</b></span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #cc0000;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><b>I am trying</b></span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #cc0000;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><b>I am moving, not sure in what direction but I am moving</b></span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #cc0000;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><b>Sixty-five days</b></span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #cc0000;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><b>65 days ago I made a decision, a decision that did and will change my life</b></span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #cc0000;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><b>A lifelong decision, a never-ending decision, </b></span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #cc0000;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><b>A decision that will be with me for the rest of my life…</b></span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #cc0000;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><b>A decision only I could make</b></span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #cc0000;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><b>Sixty-five days ago</b></span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #cc0000;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><b>My.life.changed.</b></span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #cc0000;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><b>FORVER</b></span></span></span></div><!--EndFragment-->hockeygirlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09075540547587492412noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1313216760697384197.post-74631055934232793052010-07-08T01:06:00.002-05:002010-07-08T01:09:54.079-05:00you♥<div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">dear boy. you broke my heart. you probably dont even know, thats okay. i suppose its better that way. im the best friend, thats all i am. just know that when she breaks your heart, ill be there... holding you, with a shoulder to lean on. ill always be there. ill always love you, no matter how much pain you bring to my heart. know that every minute spent with you brings me joy & a smile on my darkest days... they are the best days yet the hardest at the same time. having you right in front of me yet knowing i cant have you, kills me. you will always have my heart & i know one day you'll hold me, if not because im 'the girl' then just because he broke my heart & i need to be held. boy, i love you & always will, no matter what. know that ill never blame you for the pain caused on your account. you are the first thing i think about when i wake up & the last when i shut my eyes.</span></div>hockeygirlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09075540547587492412noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1313216760697384197.post-68387495482610232012010-07-04T19:03:00.001-05:002010-07-04T19:04:40.692-05:00“save sorrow for the souls in doubt…”♫<div style="color: #b0b0b0; font-family: Verdana, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; line-height: 16px; text-align: center;">...you look at me because i’m different, he smiles because i’m unique…</div><div style="color: #b0b0b0; font-family: Verdana, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; line-height: 16px; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="color: #b0b0b0; font-family: Verdana, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; line-height: 16px; text-align: center;">...you judge because i’m not like everyone, he loves because i’m the only ‘me’…</div><div style="color: #b0b0b0; font-family: Verdana, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; line-height: 16px; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="color: #b0b0b0; font-family: Verdana, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; line-height: 16px; text-align: center;">...you point out my faults, he admires his work…</div><div style="color: #b0b0b0; font-family: Verdana, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; line-height: 16px; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="color: #b0b0b0; font-family: Verdana, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; line-height: 16px; text-align: center;">...you judge because of my mistakes, he washes them away…</div><div style="color: #b0b0b0; font-family: Verdana, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; line-height: 16px; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="color: #b0b0b0; font-family: Verdana, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; line-height: 16px; text-align: center;">...you poke at my weaknesses, he uses them to force dependence & strength…</div><div style="color: #b0b0b0; font-family: Verdana, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; line-height: 16px; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="color: #b0b0b0; font-family: Verdana, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; line-height: 16px; text-align: center;">...you draw tears from my eyes, he wipes them away…</div><div style="color: #b0b0b0; font-family: Verdana, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; line-height: 16px; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="color: #b0b0b0; font-family: Verdana, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; line-height: 16px; text-align: center;">...you tell me i’m not good enough, he says i’m just right…</div><div style="color: #b0b0b0; font-family: Verdana, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; line-height: 16px; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="color: #b0b0b0; font-family: Verdana, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; line-height: 16px; text-align: center;">...you tell me if wouldn’t matter if i wasn’t here, he says the world would never be the same without me…</div><div style="color: #b0b0b0; font-family: Verdana, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; line-height: 16px; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="color: #b0b0b0; font-family: Verdana, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; line-height: 16px; text-align: center;">...you want me to conform, he wants me to stand out…</div>hockeygirlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09075540547587492412noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1313216760697384197.post-70714063246009821362010-07-01T14:57:00.001-05:002010-07-01T15:03:18.658-05:00Love…Hate…Belief<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Helvetica; line-height: 24px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;"> </span></b></span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;"><br />
</span></b></span> <br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><b><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">i LOVE:<o:p></o:p></span></span></span></b></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">wife beaters<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">powerade slush’s from sonic<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">hoodies<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">music<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">my friends<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">ramen<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">cold<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">nesquik<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">daddys cooking<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">sitting in the dark<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">fire<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">believing<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">movie nights<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">rings<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">the city<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">the country<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">God<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">dogs<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">storms<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">writing<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">trust<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">pasta<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">the word gherkin<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">driving... windows down, air off, music crankin<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">the stars<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">the clouds<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">making you smile<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">country nights, with no city lights or sounds<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">an open road<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">accents<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">late night talks on the porch<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">listening<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><b><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">i HATE:<o:p></o:p></span></span></span></b></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">Pickles<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">writing<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">mustard<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">my mums phone<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">the dark<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">my heart<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">allergies<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">the city<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">friends hurting<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">guilt<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">trust<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">my ignorance<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">crying<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">questioning<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">labels<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">religion… don’t be confused on this one.<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">Spiders<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">People judging<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">Doubting<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">limits<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">slow drivers<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">thinking<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">fighting<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">liars<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">assumptions<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">emotion<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">inequality<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">my mind<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">letting you down<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><b><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">i BELIEVE IN:<o:p></o:p></span></span></span></b></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">you <3<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">heaven<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">justice<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">the past<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">choices<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">second chances<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">trusting<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">peace<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">hell<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">the future<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">lying just a little<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">love<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">living as ONE<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">protection… guard your heart and well being<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">the present<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">death<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">dreams<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">finding people you'd give your life for & doing so<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">belief<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">living<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0b5394;">loveing each other</span></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><br />
</span></div>hockeygirlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09075540547587492412noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1313216760697384197.post-7551276460029493572010-06-29T01:58:00.000-05:002010-06-29T01:58:58.963-05:00“being lost is so close to being found…”<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #b0b0b0; font-family: Verdana, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 16px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">how long will it take for me to start seeing my scars as a sign that i might make it instead of a sign that i almost didnt… how long will it take for me to actually FEEL like im making progress, not just hear it… how long until i actually know that im loved by God & others instead of just being told… when will it hit me that i will be okay, even after i die instead of just fighting the battle of not even wanting to live…</span></span></span>hockeygirlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09075540547587492412noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1313216760697384197.post-64578530733592571432010-06-27T01:20:00.002-05:002010-06-27T01:20:38.122-05:00the question arose<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #444444;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">this question arose the other day in a conversation...</span></b></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #444444;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><br />
</span></b></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #444444;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><br />
</span></b></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #444444;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">'...if you dont wake up tomorrow, if it turns out that today was your last day on earth, would you be proud of what you've done in your life? ...if not, you better think about gettin there, and gettin squared around...'</span></b></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #444444;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><br />
</span></b></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #444444;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><br />
</span></b></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #444444;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">this one stopped me in my thoughts, thats a scary thing to think</span></b></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #444444;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><br />
</span></b></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #444444;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">about, but a legitimate point to ponder & a serious question...</span></b></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #444444;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><br />
</span></b></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #444444;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><br />
</span></b></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #444444;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">my answer is no...</span></b></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #444444;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><br />
</span></b></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #444444;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><br />
</span></b></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #444444;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">now, next question im asking myself, how do i get that to a yes... i dont know, which to me is an even scarier thing...</span></b></span>hockeygirlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09075540547587492412noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1313216760697384197.post-3434297090156620142010-06-26T13:45:00.003-05:002010-06-27T14:50:57.630-05:00“He is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit." Ps 34:18<div style="color: #b0b0b0; font-family: Verdana, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; line-height: 16px;"><br />
knee’s weaken<br />
heart slows<br />
ground shakes<br />
hands tremble<br />
breaths deepen<br />
legs buckle</div><div style="color: #b0b0b0; font-family: Verdana, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; line-height: 16px;"><br />
</div><div style="color: #b0b0b0; font-family: Verdana, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; line-height: 16px;">i fall</div><div style="color: #b0b0b0; font-family: Verdana, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; line-height: 16px;"><br />
</div><div style="color: #b0b0b0; font-family: Verdana, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; line-height: 16px;">hands claspe</div><div style="color: #b0b0b0; font-family: Verdana, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; line-height: 16px;">eyes close<br />
mind runs<br />
lips move<br />
ears listen<br />
tears fall</div>hockeygirlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09075540547587492412noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1313216760697384197.post-13927845373593534562010-06-25T13:58:00.002-05:002010-06-25T14:25:49.714-05:00“Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights.”<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande'; font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 11px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: white;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"> </span></span></b></span></span></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande'; font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 11px;"></span></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande'; font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 11px;"><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: white; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"><b> </b></span></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: white; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><b></b></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: white; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><b><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.blogger.com/post-edit.g?blogID=1313216760697384197&postID=1392784537359353456" name="OLE_LINK1"></a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">James 1:17<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">Your time is not your time… it is MY time<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">Your love is not your love… it is MY love<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">Your body is not your body… it is MY body<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">You heart is not your heart… it is MY heart<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">Your money is not your money… it is MY money<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">Your gifts are not your gifts… they are MY gifts<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">Your marriage is not your marriage… it is MY marriage<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">Your life is not your life… it is MY life<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">it all belongs to Me<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">What are you doing with MY time<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">What are you doing with MY love<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">What are you doing with MY body<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">What are you doing with MY heart<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">What are you doing with MY money<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">What are you doing with MY gifts<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">What are you doing with MY marriage?<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">What are you doing with MY life<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">How are you giving time back to ME<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">How are you returning the love to ME<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">How are you giving your body back to ME<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">How are you giving your heart back to ME<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">How are you giving money back to ME<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">How are you retuning the gifts to ME<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">How are you giving your marriage back to ME?<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">How are you giving your life back to ME<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">all are Mine, always have been and always will be<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><br />
</div><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 16.0pt; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-align: center; text-autospace: none;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><br />
</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><br />
</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">“The earth is the Lord’s, and everything in it.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><o:p></o:p></span></div><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-align: center;"><span style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">The world and all its people belong to him”</span></span><span style="color: black;"><o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 11px; font-weight: normal;"><b></b></span></span></span><br />
<span style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 16pt; text-align: center;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">Psalm 24:1 </span></div></div></b></span></span></div></b></span></div></span></span>hockeygirlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09075540547587492412noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1313216760697384197.post-79353925984944193672010-06-24T23:44:00.003-05:002010-06-25T22:51:49.165-05:00Who You’d Be Today<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #274e13;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #274e13;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I often wonder who you’d be today</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #274e13;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I wonder who I’d be if you were still here</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #274e13;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I wonder how much I’d be different</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #274e13;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I wonder if you’d be proud of me</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #274e13;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I wonder what you’d say to me, my life, and my mistakes</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #274e13;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I try not to be angry</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #274e13;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">But, I am</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #274e13;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">You got to see just over fifteen years of my life…</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #274e13;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">A long time? ...No, not to me</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #274e13;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">You never got to see me drive, play, graduate, or meet my friends…</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #274e13;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">You’ll never see me get married</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #274e13;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I’ll never hear your voice again</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #274e13;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Feel your warm hands</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #274e13;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Or hear that familiar ‘sissy’ on the other end of the line</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #274e13;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I’d give anything to hear you, hug you, or smell you again</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #274e13;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">For you too just hold me once again, one last time and for you to just tell me it’s all gonna be okay.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #274e13;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I’m happy you’re not hurting anymore</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #274e13;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">No more pain or frustration</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #274e13;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">But</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #274e13;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I need you here, with me… please.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #274e13;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I think about you all the time</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #274e13;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Everyday, all day…</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #274e13;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">It’s the little things that draw the tears</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #274e13;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The subtle reminders of you</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #274e13;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">And knowing you’re not here.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #274e13;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">My memories of you are fading</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #274e13;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I’m so scared they’ll all be gone one day</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #274e13;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I can’t let that happen, I don’t want to forget you</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #274e13;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Ironically, the one memory of you that hasn’t faded at all, is the one I hate the most</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #274e13;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The one I want so desperately to forget…</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #274e13;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The one I relive everyday</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #274e13;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Why can’t the good ones stay</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #274e13;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Why it is the bad ones that are left to torture me</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #274e13;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Why? ...Another question I’m left with</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #274e13;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">And another answer I'll never find or understand.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #274e13;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I’ll try to hold on to my memories, </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #274e13;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">And not forget you</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #274e13;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Rest assured, I’ll never let a day go by without thoughts of you…</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #274e13;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #274e13;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"></span></span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #274e13;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"></span></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #274e13;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"></span></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #274e13;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"></span></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #274e13;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><div class="MsoNormal" style="color: black; font-family: Times; line-height: 24px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #274e13;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I wonder what you’d think of me,</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="color: black; font-family: Times; line-height: 24px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #274e13;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">My questions, confusion, and fears…</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="color: black; font-family: Times; line-height: 24px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #274e13;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I wonder who you’d be today</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="color: black; font-family: Times; line-height: 24px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #274e13;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">More often, I wonder who I’d be.</span></span></div></span></span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #274e13;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I love you, forever and eternal</span></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #274e13;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></span><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhqSWk_eWr-iDy4FJRBw8uwIXTMpVr1s3RybeLRL13iyRnXbjQvczdQGgkFEyZPE3iHkyTn__da5wmlUQO0ULu3whkjTVdDRCPWUXOaetS0APAxxleowY3F1C7JxTisD5-MaqZE9he1xxA/s1600/36451_1257017298713_1028010482_31118010_2141610_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhqSWk_eWr-iDy4FJRBw8uwIXTMpVr1s3RybeLRL13iyRnXbjQvczdQGgkFEyZPE3iHkyTn__da5wmlUQO0ULu3whkjTVdDRCPWUXOaetS0APAxxleowY3F1C7JxTisD5-MaqZE9he1xxA/s320/36451_1257017298713_1028010482_31118010_2141610_n.jpg" /></a></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #274e13;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br />
</span></span></div>hockeygirlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09075540547587492412noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1313216760697384197.post-2678013837824313482010-06-12T11:45:00.002-05:002010-06-12T11:45:26.105-05:00words... such power<!--StartFragment--> <br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #f3f3f3;">Why do I work so hard to keep my promises when people just throw words around like they’re nothing and have no intention of keeping their promises or actually meaning what they say? Does anybody realize how powerful words are? They can do so much harm, so much good, hurt so many, and provide something to hold onto for others. Don’t say you’ll do something or TRY to do something if you have NO intention at all of doing it or even trying too. If you say something to someone, you better mean it with all of your being. If you choose to say something hurtful, watch out... you have no idea the influence of your words. Choose to say something nice, I know its hard sometimes, but again... the impact of those words span MUCH farther than you can even imagine. Nobody said it would easy to be the bright spot in some ones day, it is much easier to just not care and in return miss a valiant opportunity to help someone; but do you really want that on your conscious, that you could have provided someone with the hope they need or even just a momentary relief from the rest of their life and troubles? Words… they are one of the most power things out there and some days I wander if people truly understand the affect they can and do have on so many with even the smallest words and phrases. Many days I curse the fact that everyone is allotted a mouth to speak from… TWO ears, ONE mouth…maybe we should all listen a little more and speak a little less; at least until we understand the power of what comes from our mouths. </span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #f3f3f3;">Never underestimate the power and affect your words have, both positive and negative, on everyone you come in contact with… It can be so simple to brighten some ones day, small things do wonders; it is also so easy to hurt someone with so few words too.</span></div><!--EndFragment-->hockeygirlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09075540547587492412noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1313216760697384197.post-12755502633317499752010-06-08T23:07:00.004-05:002010-06-09T15:00:09.884-05:00Letter's to God<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #b0b0b0; font-family: Verdana, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; line-height: 16px;"></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #3d85c6;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">Letters to God<br />
I write letters to God<br />
Call me crazy<br />
Call me dumb<br />
Call me what you want<br />
I still write letters to God</span></span></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #3d85c6;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><br />
</span></span></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #3d85c6;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">They say,<br />
I’m sorry<br />
I’m hurting<br />
I’m angry and<br />
I’m sad</span></span></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #3d85c6;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><br />
</span></span></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #3d85c6;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">They ask,<br />
Why?</span></span></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #3d85c6;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">What for?<br />
How? and<br />
When?</span></span></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #3d85c6;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><br />
</span></span></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #3d85c6;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">They ask for answers<br />
They ask for help<br />
For forgiveness<br />
And for hope</span></span></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #3d85c6;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><br />
</span></span></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #3d85c6;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">They say, </span></span></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #3d85c6;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">Thank you</span></span></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #3d85c6;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">I need you,<br />
And i love you<br />
My letters to God</span></span></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #3d85c6;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><br />
</span></span></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #3d85c6;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">So call me crazy<br />
Call me dumb<br />
Call me what you may<br />
But I’ll still write my letters to God</span></span></span>hockeygirlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09075540547587492412noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1313216760697384197.post-24239180133461436622010-06-08T15:48:00.003-05:002010-06-08T22:16:02.634-05:00validvalid thoughts<br />
valid questions<br />
valid doubts<br />
valid fears<br />
valid...<br />
<br />
why am i guilty about them<br />
why do i fear them<br />
why is it a problem to ask, <br />
...voice<br />
why do i feel like im doing something wrong when i do...<br />
<br />
...maybe they arent...<br />
<br />
...maybe i shouldnt...<br />
<br />
...maybe i am...hockeygirlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09075540547587492412noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1313216760697384197.post-51105695983976090022010-06-07T15:43:00.002-05:002010-06-08T22:17:35.444-05:00Fight<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #073763;"><b>Will you fight for me?</b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #073763;"><b>Will you let me fall?</b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #073763;"><b>How can I expect you to fight for me when I won’t fight for myself?</b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #073763;"><b>Why would you?</b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #073763;"><b>I don’t understand…I guess that’s the beauty of it.</b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #073763;"><b>How am I supposed to fight for what I can’t see?</b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #073763;"><b>How am I supposed to fight for what I can’t feel?</b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #073763;"><b>How do I fight for something I don’t know?</b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #073763;"><b>…Something I never have.</b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #073763;"><b>Tell me, because I don’t know.</b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #073763;"><b>I feel myself losing.</b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #073763;"><b>I feel myself slipping.</b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #073763;"><b>I need solid ground.</b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #073763;"><b>I need to be held up.</b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #073763;"><b>I need help.</b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #073763;"><b>This is a battle that will never end.</b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #073763;"><b>But a war that I will win.</b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #073763;"><b>…There is no other option.</b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #073763;"><b>Please fight for me.</b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #073763;"><b>Don’t let me fall.</b></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #073763;"><b><br />
</b></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #073763;"><b><br />
</b></span></div>hockeygirlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09075540547587492412noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1313216760697384197.post-85806395239547149472010-05-30T22:13:00.002-05:002010-05-30T22:15:16.859-05:00"LOVE is not just an emotion, but a motion..."<div style="color: #274e13; font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><b>okay. dont get me wrong, i LOVE LOVE LOVE the date of my birth... its just a cool date & somewhat unique, but... i hate that it always falls on or near or on the observed day of memorial day. it is such a fantastic yet extremly sad holiday & gives the servicemen & women the recognition they deserve EVERY day, unfortunatly they dont always get it. i just wish that for every happy birthday or gift i get, that they would get a THANK YOU... everyone could say it a million times each & it still wouldnt come close to even saying it enough. </b></div><div style="color: #274e13; font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><br />
</div><div style="color: #274e13; font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><b>a bright side though is that i can always say that im born around memorial day or that im doing my party or lunch on or around that day AND then when someone goes, 'memorial day, whats that?' or 'ohh, the "lake" holiday', i can explain to them what it TRULY is & that its SO much more than just a "lake" holiday.</b></div><div style="color: #274e13; font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><br />
</div><div style="color: #274e13; font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><b>so, to all you servicemen & women and their families... thank you for all you do, every sacrfice, and the freedom & protection that you give us. without you, i couldnt even write this...</b></div>hockeygirlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09075540547587492412noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1313216760697384197.post-85852964486939218202010-05-21T22:03:00.003-05:002010-06-02T17:41:53.104-05:00Unprepared...Unworthy<div style="color: #990000;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; white-space: pre;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Your eyes don't see the beauty</span></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><br />
</span></div><div style="color: #990000;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">At my computer</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Close and focused</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Outsiders can see it's burning indentations on my eyes</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">My brain</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">My life as it passes vicariously through my fingers</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">With each stroke another missed opportunity</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Moments in the fabric of my life again wasted</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">No undo</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">No replay</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">No way to relive time as it should have been</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">As I wish it was</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Leaving me feeling</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Lazy</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">And unprepared for the true splendors of God's creations</span></div>hockeygirlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09075540547587492412noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1313216760697384197.post-45788606654807364572010-05-21T22:02:00.004-05:002010-05-26T20:38:47.947-05:00do you understand<div style="color: #741b47;"><b>do you understand what you're doing to me?</b></div><div style="color: #741b47;"><b>do you understand what you're pushing me to do?</b></div><div style="color: #741b47;"><b>more importantly, do you understand what you're doing to them?</b></div><div style="color: #741b47;"><b>do you understand the life you lead?</b></div><div style="color: #741b47;"><b>do you understand the pain you cause?</b></div><div style="color: #741b47;"><b>do you understand the effect you have?</b></div><div style="color: #741b47;"><b>the consequences you are sure to face?</b></div><div style="color: #741b47;"><b>do you understand... tell me, do you...</b></div><div style="color: #741b47;"><br />
<b>...i don't think you do...</b></div><div style="color: #741b47;"><br />
<b>one day you'll see what you've done<br />
one day you'll see the pain<br />
one day you'll see the life you lead<br />
one day you'll see the effects<br />
live out the consequences<br />
one day you'll understand</b></div><div style="color: #741b47;"><br />
<b>...i just hope it's not too late, but if it is, farewell...</b></div>hockeygirlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09075540547587492412noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1313216760697384197.post-38389155509982349552010-04-28T23:49:00.004-05:002010-04-28T23:50:12.334-05:00it<div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0c343d;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">I’m looking for something… I don’t even know what nor am I even sure “it” exist. </span></span></b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0c343d;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">I could never find it in my family. Dad is great, but its just not here, whatever “it” is. Mom and I just don’t see eye to eye, we’re too busy fighting for her to even notice I’m falling. </span></span></b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0c343d;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">I can’t find it in my friends. Sometime I even wonder how many of them are really friends, how much they truly care about me or if I am just another person… being used because they know ill come at the drop of a hat, that id do anything for them. How many of them would just drop me once my “use” is gone…?</span></span></b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0c343d;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">For the last 20 years I’ve been locked in this prison, same walls, same routine, same clothes…. Just going through the motions. Never thought twice about any of it, this was just how life was and is always going to be. Just another person in the world, occupying space and that was it. </span></span></b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0c343d;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">I never really looked for anything more, well until a few months ago… I don’t know what changed, but something did. There has to be more, something else. I’m not even sure what “IT” is, but I’m looking for it…</span></span></b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0c343d;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">I don’t know where I’m going to find “it”, when I’m going to find “it” or if I’m even going to find “it”. I never found it in the liquid temporary gold or the solid relief. I never found it in my friends or my family. It’s not coming with money. What is it that I’m looking for, what will bring the solution, what will bring happiness, peace, rest, purpose… what will make me feel like I actually matter. What is “it”? </span></span></b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0c343d;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">I have got small glimpses of “it”… just enough to show me it is familiar; Just enough to bring down some of the walls I’ve built up around me for so long. These glimpses opened me up a bit, sharing more and more with few… showing emotions I had worked so hard to burry for so long and exposing fears I tried so hard to conceal. All of this leading to years and years of stocked up tears falling from my eyes. </span></span></b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0c343d;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">These glimpses ended as quickly as they began, back to the prison, the routine, back to going through the motions, back to the other feelings… back to burying them all, concealing the fears, and back to being the strong one.</span></span></b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0c343d;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">What is it that I was feeling? What is it I’m searching for? Will I ever find it? Does it even exist?...I really want it to, but I'm just not sure.</span></span></b></span></div>hockeygirlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09075540547587492412noreply@blogger.com0